The Joy of Parenting

Friday afternoon Holden pulled out an envelope with "Mr. & Mrs. Parker" written on the front in precise teacher handwriting. It was thick and sealed. That doesn't happen very often, if ever. Holden's been in school for five years and this is the first sealed thing he's brought home. "Must be important", I tell him. He's not worried though... he knows what's inside. His smile gives that away.

What's inside is a letter telling us that because of Holden's TCAP (standardized test in Tennessee for grades three & up) scores he is being screened for PASS class. The letter doesn't bother to explain what "PASS" stands for (it's obviously an acronym), but it does tell us that Holden's scores indicate that he's " intellectually gifted".

Attached to the letter is a form for the parents (mom) to fill out to document his abilities in these areas: creativity, interest, motivation, problem solving, memory, inquiry, insight, reasoning, and humor. There are 23 questions and you are to list examples for each! If he's so smart can't he just fill this thing out? This is going to be one tedious, thought-provoking exercise. I feel tremendous pressure to do a good job. This is the screening procedure! His acceptance into this special class hinges on how well I answer these questions and if my answers are the right ones.

But you know what? Holden doesn't even seem to care if he gets in or not which I love about him . Yes, he's smart, but it doesn't seem to effect him too much. He has a good sense of balance in his life. Maybe getting into a class that pushes you to do more isn't what he needs. Wonder if the pressure of that would throw his whole world off balance? I remember being carefree like Holden is now. Wanting to do well and make good grades, but not being consumed with it. That was second grade. The year before I was moved into the advanced program. From third grade on, I remember feeling like I had to keep up with the rest of the class all of whom were the smartest of the smart. Missing school was frowned upon even if you were truly ill. I was constantly comparing myself to this kid; always coming up a little short when compared to that kid.

I remained in the advanced program through the rest of my school years and graduated with an advanced diploma. My education was good and enjoyed it for the most part. I never found school boring. I actually had fun living up to the challenges. Holden will do the same in PASS Class. But when the choice comes up (like it did for my mom) as the parent you can't help but play out each scenario in full detail in your mind then still not knowing the just right thing to do. Guess that's the joy of parenting. (Along with having an intellectually gifted child!)